10. "President Obama's approval rating down to 46 percent. That means 54 percent of the people do not approve of the job he's doing, which I think is totally unfair. We should at least wait until he actually does something." -Jay Leno

9. "Big news, Lou Dobbs announced on his show last night that he was leaving CNN. No word on where Dobbs is going to go next, but I think we can all rule out Telemundo." -Jimmy Fallon

8. "When you think about it and think about what it meant at the time and what it has meant since it really is one of those things that in our lifetime we have been tremendously lucky to observe the end of the wall in Berlin. The wall came down 20 years ago today. And that signaled the end of communism. Until, of course, Obama and his pinko buddies took over." -David Letterman

7."I mean, who goes hiking in Iraq? What was the rafting trip to Somalia all booked up?" -Jay Leno

6. "Last night, on 'Larry King Live' ... former Miss California, Carrie Prejean, refused to talk about her sex tape. She got angry for Larry asking what she called, 'inappropriate questions.' Yeah, apparently Larry kept asking, 'Do you want to see my sex tape?'" -Conan O'Brien

5. "A huge week for the President. Obama leaves tomorrow for a ten-day trip to Singapore, China, South Korea and Japan. Meanwhile, today, Joe Biden ate breakfast, lunch and dinner at Panda Express." -Jimmy Fallon

4. "President Obama is traveling to Asia this week. He'll be making a trip to China. While he's there, Obama plans to visit the Forbidden City, the Great Wall, and America's money." -Conan O'Brien

3. "40th anniversary of 'Sesame Street.' Yeah, this is big. First Lady Michelle Obama was on 'Sesame Street' today, showing children how to plant their own healthy vegetable gardens. Isn't that nice? Yeah, then the kids said, 'Screw the vegetables,' and they barbecued Big Bird" -Conan O'Brien

2. "Google has announced that they're going to give free Internet access in airports all across the country. It's fantastic! Up until now, the only way to see something pornographic at an airport was to follow a senator into the bathroom." -Craig Ferguson

1. "It's been reported that outspoken anti-immigration anchor Lou Dobbs is leaving CNN. Yeah. True story, yeah. He'll be replaced by a guy named Juan, who will do the same job for $5 an hour." -Conan O'Brien

And four more for extra measure...

1. "Lou Dobbs has quit CNN. And here's the weird part: He didn't want to quit, his work visa expired." -Jay Leno

2. "Actually, to win passage for this health-care bill, President Obama went up to Capitol Hill and personally lobbied some of the wavering congressmen. And of course, the health insurance industry, they were very upset. You know, they said they bought and paid for these congressmen, he has no right to go up to them and talk to them." -Jay Leno

3. "They have a bottle of beer that was on board the Hindenburg and it was auctioned off. You know the Hindenburg, that was the biggest thing to crash and burn in New Jersey next to the Corzine campaign." -David Letterman

4. "Former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer, who was forced to resign because he used prostitutes, will deliver a lecture tomorrow at the Harvard center for Ethics. Yeah, if you want to check out the speech, it costs $500 for half an hour, $900 if you want to stay for the whole hour." -Jimmy Fallon

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